Snails see the benefits

hmm... I was tutoring one of my students yesterday and this sort of how our convo went:

"kevin, your teacher wants you to learn how to write the date and year on your paper. What is today's date?"

"Easter."

"No, Kevin thats a holiday and that was yesterday....what DATE is it? Like numbers?"

"Easter."

"Sigh... okay, nevermind. What year is it?"

"Easter."

"........ no.... Kevin the year!! year as in 20_ what? You say the missing numbers!"

"20_EASTER!!!. *sheepish grin on his face*"

"okay, Kevin you win. You can write Easter on your paper"

Now, I'm still questioning whether he really loves Easter or he was just messing with my mind. I think it's a little bit of both. Anyways, this story really has no correlation to what I want to write about, it just makes me smile when I think about it. Oh, except there is a slight connection because of something that someone said during our Easter Love Feast that I would like to really open this blog with.

Easter Day, Love Feast #2, lots and lots of artery-clogging foods. During our testimonial time, one of the brothers mentioned how yes, one prayer can change things, but if you really look at Christianity and people in the bible, it really comes down to praying many, many, many prayers. In other words, persevering in prayer and continual obedience. That really hit me because it's so damn true. Moses didn't even get to go into the Promiseland, yet it wasn't the end result that kept Him going, it was the love He had for His father. He wasn't result-oriented, but express-oriendted. He wanted to express the love of God in his entire life, no matter the end goal or prize.

What a humbling thought. I guess you can call it the season I'm in, or rather the things that life is hitting me with, I am definitely at my peak of endurance. Man.... God make me someone like Moses! Or Paul. Or John. Or any of those people that loved you who were really faced with trials and persecutions.

I just have to add a song in this blog bc...... thats just how I relate to things, but listen up folks. I'm still sad to this day that this band broke up, but I shall honor their memory by recognizing one of their greatest songs (in my opinion.. probably cause its had a great impact..)

The Format- Snails

" Snails see the benefits, the beauty in every inch." This one line alone is so beautiful. Rather than being negative and seeing the slowness of snails as a disadvantage, the format has turned the negative into a positive. Snails were created to be slow, but rather it being a hindrance, they are the ones being rewarded. They are the lucky ones, for they were created to enjoy the beauty in their surroundings.

Too deep for interpretation?? NO! this is so encouraging for me. I need to learn to be in God's presence right now. To enjoy the enormous amounts of blessings I have, rather than complain in crappy things of life. Persevere and endure! Endure because God is doing amazing things in my life right now. The beauty in every inch! man... what a beautiful line, I can't get over it.

Dear God, make me like a snail, so I can slither slowly away. haha =)

this is so disgusting. HAHAH

The road less traveled

As much as God is control of our lives, He gives us the gift of choice. Like I wrote in one of my earlier posts, we are faced with choices from the moment our eyes open to the moment we close them again. We choose what to eat, wear, say, think, act, etc.

There's a huge reason why Jesus teaches on entering the gate that is narrow and the way that is hard. Its the road that leads to life and those who find it are few. It kind of reminds me of the scene from LOTR3, when Aragorn leads Legolas and Gimli into the Paths of Death, where they were to acquire the help from the Army of the Dead. (wow, embrace the nerdiness) It was obviously the road that most others would not have taken, but Aragorn knew that it was the one that was the most promising.

Anyways, back to reality. There is usually two paths to choose from. One path that is seemingly familiar, comfortable, and usually the one that we choose. The other... well the other is like the Path of Death in lotr. The path that is unfamiliar, uninviting, and just scary. This is the path that is right for us, but is usually never the one that is taken.

Even though I'm only 22, there have been multiple paths that I have taken that have been marked with my shoes, simply because I've taken it so many times. You know that fresh imprint that your tennis shoes leaves right after your step in a pile of mud? yeah, its like re-walking into those steps over and over again. But, its more of a orbital path because it never really goes anywhere, but just back to where you started. K, this is starting to make no sense. Basically, we often find ourselves re-learning the same lessons over and over again because we refuse to take the path that is narrow. We take the one that is wide, seemingly comforting because of its familiarity, and because its "easier." But, by taking this choice, we end up having to go through things that we thought we had learned, and go through them again. (maybe even worse..)

Now, the questions is.... where is this path that you need to take? What does it even look like? Being as fickle as we are, no matter how great you think you are, we all need a savior and someone to direct us. When we learn to trust in our own abilities to lead us in life, it usually ends up leading to selfishness, greed, brokenness

But, when you follow God, YOU KNOW that it'll ONLY lead to life. God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit's ONLY message is LOVE.

LOVE! love. How can a road to love ever be harmful? It never can. Imagine a world where every single person went down that narrow road of love.... there wouldn't be world hunger, wars, depression, brokenness.

When you need to make a decision about something, just ask yourself this: "What would Jesus do? He would love. Make the decision that'll take you down that road."

Yeah, this doesn't look so inviting, huh? Who would want to go in there.....

BUT..

It's these badboys that come through at the end and kick all those orcs boottays.

So, the narrow and scary road will definitely prove to be worth it in the end.

No Strings Attached

I'm beginning to realize how much I don't love God as much as I say or think I do. To truly love someone, you're willing to lay down your life for them. As much as I've said openly, outloud and in my mind, that I will lay down my life for God in a heart beat, I think there has still been some luke-warm(ness) that went with it. My pastor preached on legality vs. intimacy, and it really got me thinking on how I've placed God as a law in my life.

How much do I really love Him? Am i consumed with thoughts about Him throughout the day? When I feel offended by His presence, am I willing to lay those offenses down for the sake of loving Him an ounce more? It's scary to admit, but I think its a shaky-no to all those questions. I'm not willing to give up things in my life, yet. A lot of it comes from my unbelief and skepticism of who He is.

But, there's also a battle that wages in me saying that this is simply the journey of getting to know God. I can't achieve perfection, but I also can't use that as an excuse and become jaded by the things around me. I really think it comes down to giving up or not.

I walked/ran/dragged myself through a 15-mile hike a couple of weeks ago, and I truly had to push myself to the limits. For so many people, 15 miles is nothing but a pat on the back (ahem... susan and mike), but for someone like myself, who is outwardly quite skinny, but is really overweight at heart, 15-miles was like mt.everest. *sidenote- i never knew how out of shape I was until that day.... For those of you who have never ridden a roller coaster in your life.. please don't start out with Goalith. Same goes with hiking.. if you know you're out of shape, run a few miles here and there before you try to go all crazy*

I really felt like I was dying. I even made a death video because at one point of the hike, I didn't know where the trail continued and I was all by myself. (mike and susan were leisurely strolling up the mtn...) But, there was something inside of me that literally pushed me forward. Even though I'm a tiny girl, I think God has blessed me with strength-like samson. Well, I am boasting a little bit more than I should because i know a part of the reason I kept going was the fact that I really didn't want to have rescue workers come find me.... especially since I was only on a 15-mile hike. sigh. But, definitely having a strong-will helped. I didn't give up and 6 hours later, I ended up making it out alive.

Man, hiking is such a parallel to life. Don't give up. Temptation, sins, and all that nastiness will definitely be around all the time. But, giving in to those things won't get you out alive. But, it's also about the will behind it. I not only had to get through the hike, I wanted to finish it so badly.

Basically.... don't give up. God's love for you is worth it. Suck it up and it's gonna hurt real bad.. but don't go backwards.

And if you really can't love God as much as you want to, God will always love you anyways. That's the thing about following God... we can only love because he loved us first. This is definitely a love i want to receive and give back.